Friday, March 4, 2011

Baby Steps

I'm getting a little bit more sleep. I'm gaining confidence in what I know and how to love this kid everyday. I'm biting my tongue when people share advice that feels condescending. I'm grateful for the cloud of witnesses listening to him and learning from him so they can help him grow. I'm proud of the way Matt and I are working together to make room for another life in this family.

Some days I'm lucky. Laundry and dishes happen. I get a chance to go through the mail or answer emails. Other days packages addressed to Jasper sit on the porch unopened because the whole day is consumed by this little person - his fits and his cuddling alike. Oh, who am I kidding? Those are lucky days, too.

These eight weeks at home with Jasper are flying by, but I take comfort in everything I've learned and the deep bond we already share. The thank you notes and vacuuming can certainly wait. Then again, if I wait for an unlucky day to do all those things they'll never happen. What a lovely predicament for this sleepy, happy momma.

1 comment:

val said...

Laundry and dishes are essential maybe, but also are just plain stupid, redundant, irrelevant.

I hate them. Hate. And yet my house is clean because a messy house is disruptive to peace also.

A lot can be explained here, but who has the time to sort it out?

When I had a newborn, I so resented my normal life, can you tell?

I didn't want to write the bills or run the vacuum. I just wanted to rock my baby, live in our cocoon of milk and hugging and dozing and peace.

And reality continued to intrude, over and over and over.

Please do not send me a thank you note. Just be with tiny Jasper and enjoy. This time is incredibly fleeting.

And that is one pretty little face.

Love you, Val